Theres a concept known as false attraction. Keep in mind that this feels like youre attracted to him. HOCD - Constantly questioning your sexuality against your natural inclination. There are a few key similarities between HOCD and denial. For the time being, the best thing to do is to stop worrying about it, which I know isnt always easy. Typical HOCD symptoms include: Currently suffering from OCD (Obsessive Compulsive Disorder) Recurring unwanted or intrusive thoughts about your own sexuality. being in . homosexual obsessive-compulsive disorder (HOCD). The symptoms of HOCD may also be managed with the aid of medications. Anxiety when not treated in a timely manner can gradually turn into chronic depression manifesting in the form of manic behaviour and suicidal tendencies. But how do I know if I actually have HOCD or am simply in denial? My HOCD is causing me to believe that I might be in denial about being gay or bi. Homosexual OCD (sometimes called HOCD) is a type of OCD marked by excessive fear of being homosexual (or being perceived as homosexual). hurting your partner by becoming another orientation. (2) attempts to resolve the fear through some sort of compulsion (research, checking, testing yourself etc.) It's an anxiety disorder with an intolerance to uncertainty. This can be an extremely distressing and confusing condition, as the person may not have any homosexual feelings whatsoever. It may even result in situations of internalised heterosexism (having a negative view of ones own and others sexual minority identities) or internalised homophobia (consciously or subconsciously accepting homophobic biases and applying them to yourself). AmI pretending its not happening? Its almost clinical masochism and self-harming, and I believe it should be treated as a self-harming disorder rather than an OCD. My experience as a crisis clinician allowed me to treat adolescents and children, while spending additional time updating and educating their parents. They manipulate the medical community into making this diagnosis solely to justify their self-hatred. User account menu. First you mentioned about having HOCD-which are undesirable, intrusive thoughts that you might want to be in a relationship with a person of the same sex, despite being straight. While pedophilia itself is defined as sexual attraction to children, pedophilia OCD or POCD is a subtype of OCD that causes fears or worries that one might be a pedophile. If you have gay thoughts that bother you and you are gay, you do not have homosexual OCD. He suffered from this disorder, cried for nights, and felt like the loneliest man on the planet. OCD isn't curable but with treatment it is managable. Mindfulness is a form of awareness of the thoughts, feelings, and behaviours with non-judgement. The mission of TherapyMantra is to provide inexpensive, accessible, and professional online mental health care to the individuals all around the world. Who is in your support network to help to work towards your goals? Nothing has improved. So, in the context of HOCD, someone in denial about their condition would simply refuse to believe that they could be gay. And, whatever the answer is, you can find happiness in that way. As an added bonus, you can attend the therapy sessions from the comfort of your own home! Do the same with girls. I want comments that encourage me to fight this and never give up. Required fields are marked *. This question is required. Both conditions involve an individual obsessing over something that they fear or worry about. This is also called SO-OCD, for sexual-orientation OCD. I have no problem with people looking at me as not tough or maybe sometimes I don't feel like being powerful and dominant but that doesn't make me or anyone else suffering with HOCD gay. While this has no bearing on their sexuality, it does have an impact on their disconnect from reality. The condition is characterized by having aggressive, intrusive thoughts of doing violence to someone, as well as the responses the person uses to cope with these thoughts. Due to the overwhelming amount of men posting on here with irrational fears that they are gay, and I have never read so many different forum posts on the same exact topic by the way, I thought I would make a post of my experience both with being in the closet as a homosexual and my sexual obsessions dealing with Obsessive Compulsive Disorder. "HOCD is a figment of the imagination of the religious crazies who are in denial about the fact they're gay. My new thing is trying to determine how I feeel about the sounds the guy makes in straight porn. Attend to the intrusive thoughts; accept them and allow them in, then allow them to move on. This can be an effective treatment for patients who can identify their negative thoughts and work to change them. These obsessions foster doubts; doubts about whether their thoughts are significant; doubts about who they really are. Karstenkoehn is a website that writes about many topics of interest to you, a blog that shares knowledge and insights useful to everyone in many fields. 02 Identifying subtypes of Pure OCD can be very difficult. They arent afraid to be gay. Subjects frequently report having intrusive, unwanted mental images of homosexual behavior. And if you discover you have feelings for women, thats fantastic as well. HOCD or any other mental health issue cannot be cured entirely, in other words you cant get rid of HOCD permanently. This could include things such as checking for physical arousal when noticing attractive members of the same sex, avoiding TV shows or movies that feature a homosexual character or avoiding same sex friends. Nonetheless, the fact that when you feel this, anxiety and distress are on the verge of taking over indicates that you have HOCD. 01 Sexual Orientation OCD (previously called Homosexual OCD or HOCD) is a subset in which sufferers constantly question their sexuality. It is different nowadays. Search within r/HOCD. Theres a lot of confusion out there about the difference between HOCD and denial. Meeting with a psychologist can be a resourceful option to work through some of these difficult thought processes. It becomes heterosexual OCD as well. Your email address will not be published. This turns into unwanted thoughts and fears that youre losing your sexual identity or in denial of your attractions, as well as relationship issues and difficulty performing sexually. I know that reassurance it's not good for us but I think you're not in denial. It was really sweet of you to even read my post. Its a form of homophobia, but its also a mental illness, and you should never be mean to people who are mentally ill. On the other hand, people who conceal their sexual identities are referred to as closeted or as being in the closet. Top Freelance Writing Jobs For Beginners UK: 20+ Best Websites! If you think you may have HOCD or denial, it is important to remember that you are not alone. But somewhere it is believed too. Thats just having issues with your orientation. Couldn't repair the damage. I decided that I wanted to help people with OCD, so I became an OCD therapist, and eventually, a clinical supervisor. There are 3 types of denial. This is more frequent, and is why its commonly referred to as HOCD. Its perfectly normal and healthy to have doubts about your sexuality. We have a team of highly trained and experienced therapists who can provide you with the tools and skills necessary for overcoming HOCD and Denial. It becomes heterosexual OCD as well. Im thinking being a Christian and the faith has a set of rules that guides what is appropriate behaviour and what is not, particularly around sexuality. -- Sun Mar 30, 2014 2:18 am --. Am I refusing to face the facts? I am 18 years old and a senior in high school. Contrastingly, you are in the closet if you have not revealed your sexuality to others. But even if you do have feelings for other guys, its not a total disaster. Begin a mindfulness practice. Homosexual OCD (hOCD) is characterized by obsessions like fear of becoming gay, fear of secretly being in denial regarding homosexuality, fear of being seen by others as homosexual, fear that deficits in sexual . They arent afraid to be gay. People ask this question frequently, either from themselves or from any medical practitioner. Take intrusive thoughts less personally, and let go of your emotional reaction to them. Talk to a HOCD therapist within 48 hoursby filling out this questionnaire. When this occurs, the person with OCD often sees this as further evidence that they have been in denial all along. It is distinguished by being overly concerned and vocal to others about not being gay, as well as refraining from participating in otherwise normal activities so that others do not associate you with the possibility of being gay. OCD is a mental health condition that can cause a person to have intrusive and reoccurring thoughts and images, as well as feel compelled to repeat specific behaviors. The best thing to do for this is seek an OCD specialists. Valheim Genshin Impact Minecraft Pokimane Halo Infinite Call of Duty: Warzone Path of Exile Hollow Knight: Silksong Escape from Tarkov Watch Dogs: Legion. One day when my thoughts come up, Im able to resist them and they dont affect me. Do you think I am in denial? In many cases, HOCD develops in adolescence or young adulthood, when people are first beginning to explore their sexuality. Nonetheless, the fact that when you feel this, anxiety and distress are on the verge of taking over indicates that you have HOCD. These include having a family history of OCD or anxiety, being under a lot of stress, or have experienced trauma or abuse. Im sorry to hear you are struggling. Denial is a type of defense mechanism that involves ignoring the reality of a situation to avoid anxiety. I'm very confused at the moment. Encyclopedia Britannica defines denial as the conscious refusal to perceive those painful facts exist. You know, basically hocd has nothing to do with sexual orientation. Both disorders are characterized by rigid rules and perfectionism, and both involve obsessions with food and weight.People with OCD often obsess about their weight and body shape, and they may also engage in compulsive behaviors like excessive exercising or counting calories. This is the question I get asked the most. Just stay connected till the end. Obsessive Compulsive Disorder (OCD) Forum, Re: HOCD vs. Starting a month ago I suddenly had this fear of turning gay or that I am gay and just never did truly know. Constantly reassuring yourself that you are straight. In contrast, the homosexual response from both genders was more of a large-scale "I knew I was different.". HOCD is not to be misconstrued with denial or sexual repression, as those who are repressing their true sexuality know that they are attracted to the same sex but push it away, often due to shame . It often involves intrusive, sexual thoughts around prepubescent children. (Explained), What Is The Difference Between Judo And Wrestling? . But when denial starts to interfere with your life and wellbeing, thats when it becomes a problem. Scan this QR code to download the app now, https://www.reddit.com/r/bisexual/comments/7vfza0/majorly_confused/. And M.Ed.? However, intrusive thoughts that you may be gay enter your thought . Through this exposure, your therapist will help you develop response prevention measures based on what you hope to accomplish with therapy. Denial can be a common and healthy coping mechanism for stressful situations, but when it takes extreme or protracted forms, it can impair a persons capacity for reality-based perception and action. Any answer isn't good enough. Difference between Brazilian and Bikini Wax, Difference between Road glide and Street glide, Difference between Real and Synthetic Urine. Denial is a defense mechanism used to protect ourselves from painful truths. If you are in a crisis or any other person may be in danger dont use this site. 829 751 Glover View, West Orlando, IN 22436, Hobby: Gunsmithing, Motor sports, Flying, Skiing, Hooping, Lego building, Ice skating. Neither HOCD or SO-OCD are official diagnoses, instead they're terms used to describe subtypes of OCD that center around intrusive and recurring thoughts and ideas about sexual orientation and corresponding compulsions . 3. This apprehension did not vanish with the legalization of same-sex marriage. Even if they are straight and do not desire to be attracted to the same sex, people with HOCD may have obsessive thoughts about being gay or about being attracted to the same sex. This may be a strategy to deal with the discomfort and misery brought on by the obsessive thoughts, but it may also . Accept that sexuality is natural and that gay feelings are normal and not a bad thing. Parker: Their Differences, What Is The Difference Between M.A. Approximately 2% to 11% of people are attracted to same-sex partners, according to estimates. That thought haunts them every day and is always with them. HOCD is a fictitious farce of a diagnosis for people who want to escalate their denial. Cognitive-behavioral therapy is the form of therapy that is most successful for treating HOCD (CBT). For someone with HOCD, this may be a fear that they are gay or lesbian, even if they have no prior experience or attraction to the same sex. Avoiding people of your same gender due to anxiety or unwanted fears that you might be gay. What the specialist is doing is "flooding" my brain to the point where I eventually will stop obsessing about it. Those who dont believe its true: you havent had it, and you dont have OCD. HOCD is a form of OCD. There is this double-life feeling: date someone of the opposite sex, and it will be assumed by the majority that you are straight. Reddit and its partners use cookies and similar technologies to provide you with a better experience. Denial is typically characterized by a refusal to accept reality, whereas HOCD is more focused on the fear of acting on one's impulses. You noted that you dont want to be in a same-sex relationship because you are Christian. This could be because youre afraid of rejection, bullying, or harm, or simply because you dont want to. I FEAR the attraction. If you think you might be suffering from HOCD, its important to seek professional help. Do you have unwanted thoughts about your sexuality? By using ERP in our sessions, you can look forward to better days ahead. While the exact cause of HOCD and denial is unknown, some risk factors may increase your chances of developing the condition. Unlessyourebisexual,youwontfeel any sexualorromanticattractiontotheoppositesexifyouretrulyhomosexual. How do you tolerate distress/anxiety? How do I determine that? Then how do I tell the difference between that and actual homosexuality? POCD - Having sexually inappropriate thoughts about children. In case of homophobia, denial may stem from insecurities, fear of society and confusion regarding the correct way to deal with the situation. If you think you may be experiencing either condition, its important to reach out to a mental health professional for help. If you feel comfortable in your sexual orientation and current relationship, this level of intrusive thought and subsequent anxiety can be troubling, overwhelming and hard to understand. Privacy Policy. Ive been working in the mental health field for over 7 years, with experience treating OCD within crisis and anxiety management. Its too soon for a label while youre still figuring things out. 6. For a quick web story summary, click here. Just because you may have certain thoughts, that does not necessarily mean that you would act out those thoughts. Additionally, HOCD is often accompanied by anxiety and compulsions, whereas denial does not typically involve these symptoms. Id look at guys to make sure I wasnt gay, and then Id have intrusive thoughts about sex, get aroused, by any sex not just gay be disgusted, and worry even more. Questioning your sexual orientation is incredibly common, and it's a thought anyone can have. And, no, you are not experiencing an identity crisis. These intrusive thoughts also cause distress. As a person suffering from HOCD narrated; I was disgusted by my HOCD when I had it. In CBT, you'll work with a therapist to learn ways of thinking that can help you become less sensitive to the intrusive thoughts. This goes for being bisexual too. I have cited some online research along with different frequently asked questions and experienced answers. The subjects often experience intrusive, unwanted mental ima. I enjoy a girls beautiful face, ass, tits,etc. OCD also known as the doubting disorder can make you question things that you were sure of just 5 minutes ago. For example, if someone has been interested in partners of the same sex and they obsess about whether or not theyre actually attracted to the opposite sex, it could be SO-OCD or HOCD. You enjoy the physical qualities of a man. Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder message board, open discussion, and online support group. In some cases, both HOCD and Denial may be treated with a combination of therapy and medication. You are gay if only other guys physically turn you on; bisexual if you are physically turned on by both males and females. Sorry for the rant. Any advise would be greatly appreciated. "Well, duh!". My specialist has told me he has gotten all types of guys with this. Im also curious about what sorts of rules you live by? A mental health expert can support you and help you understand and control your thoughts and feelings if you are having persistent and unwelcome doubts about your sexual orientation. Others mistakenly interpret it as an early part of the coming out process. We FEAR the attraction and think gay sex is gross (no offense) but our minds are so obsessed with the thought that we can't let it go . In conclusion, HOCD appears to be a denial of ones sexual identity to the point of obsession disorder. Thus, experiments are not needed, you get a feeling on your own. Thus, experiments are not needed, you get a feeling on your own. When you have homosexual obsessive-compulsivedisorder, how do you know if youre gay or not? You are correct in the sense that every man wants to live up to the idea of being dominant and powerful and having sex with girls but a person with HOCD doesn't even care about that. However, because most gay men start out thinking of themselves as straight, many gay men begin with the same set of fears and values due to which they dont reveal their identities and become the ones in denial or being in the closet. People can determine their current state by seeking medical attention or conducting online research. Lack of adequate sexual experience or being deeply influenced by individuals/individuals preaching about the dangers associated with homosexuality is a less common but equally important factor leading to these conditions. If you answered yes to any of these questions, then you might be in denial. I now specialize in OCD and Exposure and Response Prevention (ERP) therapy. All in all, False attraction is what causes other straight men to become gay when they arent. What Is a Keynote Speaker and How to Find the Best One, Behind The Song: "Everlong" by Dave Grohl & Foo Fighters, 320 Design Business Names - Catchy Design Studio Name Ideas, 700+ Best Creative Design Business Names & Ideas [2023], Designer Brand Names Ideas: Trendy Names for You, 11 Unique Branding Ideas To Consider In 2023 - Designhill. Sexuality can be fluid and it exists on continual spectrums. Morons, . Sexual orientation refers to an individuals sense of identity based on their sexual preference. Top 4 Powerful Ways to Overcome Relationship Anxiety And ROCD. The Content on this Site is presented in a summary fashion, and is intended to be used for educational and entertainment purposes only. Sports. Sometimes because a woman doesnt seem to turn on by women and men dont seem to turn on by men. HOCD OR DENIAL??? Answer (1 of 2): Search Results ~ Featured snippet from the web Homosexual Obsessive Compulsive Disorder (HOCD): A Rare """" Homosexual Obsessive Compulsive Disorder (HOCD) is marked by excessive fear of becoming or being homosexual. The medication also works as it blocks the obsessive thoughts. Some people shared their experiences. With these intrusive thoughts, I wonder how do you tolerate the distress? Is it HOCD or am I denying my homosexuality? Is it HOCD or am I denying my homosexuality? Instead of fighting what you fear, agree with it, face it first hand. "This is an OCD board. Understandably, the thought of discussing your sexual concerns with a complete stranger may be uncomfortable. Its like I will see a good looking guy and my mind will tell me "you want to . Whats the difference between HOCD and Denial. in Clinical Mental Health Counseling, and practice Exposure and Response Prevention (ERP) therapy. Adults, Families, Couples, LGBTQ community, Sexuality. I know for a fact Im attracted to females but the fact that Im even questioning myself in the first place makes me feel like there has to be something there. Many people with OCD that weren't being treated for it crossed my path and weren't getting better. HOCD or Homosexual Obsessive Compulsive Disorder is a kind of Obsessive Compulsive Disorder characterised by the fear of being homosexual or constant obsessions about your sexuality/ sexual preferences. These resources can provide you with immediate help. Sexual orientation OCD (HOCD). I really see the difference here, you have never FEARED the attraction, you loved the attraction, despite not being able to admit it to others. Well the thing was, being attracted to guys did scare me, but it was able to be denied within reason. Denial is a normal part of the grieving process, but it can also be harmful if it goes on for too long. they cant. 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